Are You Looking for Jesus? Part 37: Glimpses of the Inner World

Another testimony from “J”. As a consequence of his abuse, the veil that separates us from the spiritual realm was partially removed for a time so Jesus could show the rest of us how he likes to heal his wounded lambs and pour out his love upon them. I also find “J”’s testimonies to be faith building and uplifting. Please enjoy this latest from “J”.

Email Subject: T: Part 37

Background: This is one of my earliest testimonies when Jesus had just recently started doing this work in me. It’s very special to me, and I’m grateful to get to share it with you. I pray the Lord blesses you as you read it and that he comes close to you, leading and guiding you through whatever you’re going through right now.

I’m really grateful I recorded so many of these things. It’s very healing getting to go back and re-read and share them. It can be scary knowing it’s recorded and others can read it, but it’s also very encouraging getting to be reminded about the God I serve and how he treated me in some of my darkest times and deepest needs. He didn’t abandon me or neglect me. He saw me, listened to me, and came to help.

One of my deepest desires is that he would do the very same for you too. If you’ve been abused too, I long for him to help you too, and I absolutely believe he wants to. I’d imagine he’s been longing to step in and help ever since it started and before too. He loves you so much.

Blessings,
J

Testimony:

“Whew, it’s been a good day today. I did almost all of my work this weekend to allow me to have today set aside primarily for just being with Jesus and inviting him to have his way with my day. It’s been such a sweet day. I have multiple things from today I want to share, but I want to start with the most recent one, which feels really big. [The other things I refer to have already been posted now! One was when Jesus freed a part who likes running and was given a little pinwheel to use while she runs. The other was when Satan tried to deceive me and dissuade me from continuing to seek Jesus in getting free.]

This afternoon (just happened):

I was playing my guitar (a hobby I’ve picked back up recently), and I was playing this song by Rend Collective called Unconditional. It’s all about Jesus’ love for us and how he views us, seeing right through all the sin and shame and seeing a child in need of grace. It’s such a beautiful song.

As I was playing, I started to feel a part present. I could tell that they were very interested. They were curious if a love like that really did exist. If so, they wanted to meet this Jesus. I spoke with them for a time to make sure, and then talked with Jesus to see if it was time to work with the part. I couldn’t tell what his answer was, and my part REALLY wanted to talk to him. So, I asked him if he would be willing to at least go and talk to her, and then they could go from there however he wished.

Soon I realized that they were already talking haha. I asked this time if Jesus would once again give me eyes to see what was happening inside, and this time he told me something along the lines of it not being a good idea this time for me to see (I think perhaps this part was in a VERY dark, evil place / or that she was in a really dark condition. Not sure). He encouraged for me to just be still and be present and allow him to talk and work with my part.

As such, I’m not privy yet to most of what they did and / or talked through. I believe they had a lot to talk through and work through, as I sat in stillness with the feeling of God’s presence strong on me for quite some time. (Not sure how long. Quite easily 15-30 minutes.) Eventually, I felt Jesus share with me some things about how this was a really big deal that he was working with this part. It would have big consequences inside of me, and I think perhaps in my body as well. However, he told me not to fear, and that He was with me. He encouraged me that I was welcome to email you guys [Patricia and Stoner] to be able to have your support as well (or something like that).

As I was in stillness (and as I write now), I can hear bits and pieces of things. I think she (this part) was married to Satan. She was his bride. She carried so much guilt and shame, feeling so utterly worthless and unlovable. He had told her that she was unlovable and made her believe it too. When she heard this song, it gave her hope that maybe things could be different. Maybe she could be loved. Maybe Jesus could see her through the guilt and shame she carried and see her as she was: a child so in need of grace.

I thought I heard something about recanting a covenant she had made, Jesus taking her through it word by word. He was so loving, strong, and patient with her. His very presence protected her in that dark place while he worked with her. It took a long time; there was much he needed to do. I do also think there were probably some entities he had to deal with as well. (I don’t know.) Yes, I think there were some very strong entities he had to cast out. They did not want to lose their place with her and were very angry. I think it’s going to take her a long time to heal.

But, finally, after a long time of working with her, Jesus let me know that she was free, and he could take her to the Safe Place now. I just sat in his presence for a time longer just soaking up him and then praying and celebrating his work! Then, I decided to play the song Unconditional again to celebrating him freeing my part!

I can still feel the weightiness of his words to me, that this is a big deal and it will have affects inside of me and I think my body as well. I’m scared, but I will just press deeper into him, and he will take care of me.”