Edifying our Listeners
Today I want to talk about something, about an activity that is common and natural to us all. We began learning this behavior before we learned to walk and we continue to exercise it to our dying breath. How we employ this activity is the function of socialization throughout our lives. What I am writing about here is the simple act of conversing; an activity that is so natural and commonplace for us that we typically give little forethought to our words as they flow forth from us. I think for most of us thoughts and ideas tend to develop even as we are presenting them. Concern for the emotional impact and practical outcome of our words is normally not uppermost in our minds during a routine conversation.
However, biblical teaching does have a few things to say regarding this very subject. Just in general, we know to regard and treat other people as Christ would. Minimally, I think this would include such things as thoughtfulness, respect, godly manners, and good will. Generally speaking, this would in essence be ascribing dignity to whomever we are addressing. Failing in this we would fundamentally be disrespecting our hearers. In other words, we would be denying others the dignity of which they were worthy.
In the fourth chapter of Paul’s letter to the Church in Ephesus, he is basically encouraging the believers to forego their former way of life and learn to live out of their new lives in Christ. Among other behaviors, this would also mean tailoring their speech in a manner that would exclude crude language while additionally encouraging others to practice Christian behaviors. Simply put, we want our language to be edifying,always motivating others to embrace holiness and righteousness in every aspect of their lives.
Consider here the words of the Apostle Paul: “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them” Ephesians 4:29 (NLT). Paul was speaking here to a lot of former unbelievers whose lifestyles included filthy language along with a careless disregard for the feelings, attitudes, and behavior of others. I think his principal concern was to encourage these novice Christians to see others through the eyes of Christ giving them due respect. Scripture teaches us to do all things as unto Christ. This would constitute all thoughts, attitudes, words, and actions.
Typically, these activities are governed in most of us by the people with whom we normally associate. For Christ, he sees everyone as those for whom he died. We tend to be “culturized” in our public treatment of others. We see this demonstrated in the public conduct of morality and ethics every day. It seems that the greatest motivations exhibited in interpersonal relationships are self-serving. It is unfortunate that so much crude behavior is flaunted before us via our so-called entertainment industry. We are inundated by these crass examples through movies and television and then naively adopt them as culturally acceptable behaviors.
There was a time when profanity wasn’t considered appropriate in public discourse. In fact, it was disdained as being crude, offensive, and inconsiderate. However, today even women use profanity as if it were a natural part of their vocabulary. I think a lot of what could be thought of as inappropriate behavior today results from a lack of self-respect in so many people. We see this in the inordinate use of makeup among women, a propensity for “fashionable” dress, the incredible affinity for tattoos, the neglecting of once accepted courtesies, such as holding the door or giving up one’s seat, and of course the frequent use of what genteel people consider offensive language. Even the polite use of “please and thank you” is commonly overlooked today.
It is as if we thought we could improve on or enhance what God has already done. In a sense, this is like demonstrating a dissatisfaction with the work of God. This activity is forever spurred on by the god of this world who never wants us to be satisfied with or accepting of ourselves. All of this is really superfluous since our criteria for what is good, better, or best is a moving target. It constantly changes with the retail market usually guiding the styles and trends of the day. Additionally, we are often influenced by the rich and famous.
This may seem like an insignificant concern for many, but if you believe that God is involved in every aspect of your life, you might want to give it some serious consideration. If we express our disagreement with something the Lord is doing or allowing in our lives by using such terms as shoot, heck, darn, nuts, rats, fudge, blast it, freakin, etc., wouldn’t that be considered corrupt communication from our mouths? Couldn’t we find ourselves in a similar position to Paul when Jesus told him, “It is hard for thee to kick against the pricks.” By using such expletives, we could find ourselves in disagreement with the sovereignty of God. We would be expressing dissatisfaction with what the Lord was involved in.
Keep in mind that the Lord is only going to allow into our lives that which is for our eternal well-being. Of course, much of what we experience might be what we would consider untoward conditions or circumstances. In such situations we would be tempted to verbalize our disgruntlement or even resentment through what I call “euphemistic cursing.” This is where we simply and casually substitute socially acceptable words for those considered harsh, blunt, or offensive. But I ask you, is there really any difference in the intent or the emotion behind what is spoken other than an effort to placate polite sensitivities? In my mind it is the same thing only we have avoided literally using the more derogatory terms. However, and more importantly, we can find ourselves in opposition to the will of God. It is far better to accept Jesus’ counsel, “But let your ‘yes’ be’yes,’ and your ‘no,’ ‘no.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.”
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could so govern our conversation that it would always bring our hearers more into the presence of the Lord? That’s probably not a very practical suggestion seeing how so much of our lives involve the things of this world. Nevertheless, we can always make it our goal, our intent, to impart grace and in some measure spiritually edify the listeners of our words.
